Saturday, July 21, 2012

Words at times fail

Sorry folks Shane Doan's visit with the New York Rangers is going to take a back seat today. Today a lot of my friends are hurting because they lost a friend who was one of the victims of the Aurora Colorado theater shootings.

I didn't know Jessica Redfield and that is my loss because almost to the person those who knew her felt that she was a very special person. Tonight there are many people trying to make sense out of what happened; trying to find answers to questions they aren't even sure how to ask.

It is times like these when you want ever so much to be able to take away the pain that those you care about are suffering but there isn't any real way you can. At best all you can really do is offer an ear to listen to and a shoulder for them to lean on.

I think the person who put it best was Justin of The Goalie Guild who wrote:

I have to find a way to channel everything that penetrates my mind into a positive flow of energy for the sake of everyone else. This is a test of life, and I want to serve others that desperately need a shoulder to lean on, or a friend to listen.

This is a chance for me to help others learn, to help others grow, to help others remember, and most importantly, to help others that are forced to cope with this tragedy, and process much more terrifying emotions that I could ever comprehend.

Yes, my main reason and purpose for being here at this moment in the world’s unfathomable timeline is to help anyone that was severely impacted by the loss of their friend, Jessica Redfield.

Days like these make me feel my age because I have watched how the hockey world has grown up during the days of Twitter, Facebook and other tools that people call "social media." It is a younger person's world and I am not ashamed to consider myself as a dinosaur.

I am very proud to see how my younger peers are reaching out to each other to be there during this time of tragedy. I can tell you from experience that you can't deny the pain no matter how hard you try.

Those corny cliches about how "there are no words ease your pain" are bogus. Telling those who you care about that you are there for them may not take away the pain but it does help ease the pain.

I say that because in days past someone like me was not allowed to tell anyone I was hurting. It was seen as a weakness to reach out to others and ask for help.

"Old school" is what they called it but truth be told "dumb school" is much more like it. I would not be here today if not for the lessons I learned about caring and compassion from so many of you.

I grew up in violence watching my father beat my mother, I was taught that pain was part of life and to accept it, enjoy it and get right back up and get into the game.

Telling you that I care supposedly made me look weak and looking weak got you nowhere. Being the "tough guy" is truly the stupidest way to go, I know having spent way too much time trying to be one.

Trust someone who ate up his emotions rather than talk about them that it is not the way to go. You can only bottle up so much before you have to release it and 99% of the time when you eventually release it; it was the wrong choice to make.

Don't try to make sense of what happened in Colorado because nobody not even the shooter will be able to explain why in a way that makes any sense. Be there for your friends and family when they are hurting is about the best you can do.

One lesson you can take away from all of this is to make sure you do tell those you care about that you care. In an instant you can lose that opportunity forever and once it is gone then regret is a heavy burden to carry.

So to all of you who have supported me over the years through thick and thin; thank you for caring about me. Thank you for teaching me lessons that I hope have made me a better person.

Better late than never.


Shane Doan visited with the Rangers on Friday and I have to say PASS ON HIM not because Doan is a bad guy but rather because he is 35. There is no way you are going to be able to convince me that Doan's body would be able to hold up playing the Tortorella system.

5 years ago, sure you take a chance but as others have already said anything more than 1 year contract is not worth the risk.

Have to acknowledge trading Casey Wellman to Florida for a 2014 5th rd pick is a bit of a head scratcher. Guess not taking what the Ranger's offered as their qualifying offer soured them on the 24 yr old.

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